


SHINee sickfics

by LittleSpoonSebastian



Category: SHINee
Genre: Angst, Appendicitis, Gen, Hospitals, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Health Issues, Neurodiversity, Phobias, Sickfic, Violence, Vomiting, Whump, sick
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 21:40:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,044
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28999170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleSpoonSebastian/pseuds/LittleSpoonSebastian
Summary: Basically just my sickfics from wattpad but I'm putting them here too because why not.
Kudos: 18





	1. Taemin [Phobia]

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I have a lot against idol talk show so if you don't like it don't read it, you're lying if you don't think this is something they would totally do.
> 
> Slight TW: there's some freaky visions of insects that might upset the softies in the audience

Taemin's solo career was a huge success. Business was booming, sales were ever-increasing, concerts were sold out. Things were great.

As per usual, he had been invited to countless variety shows and talk shows and game shows, all of them wanting that little bit of edge to their regular broadcast and creating challenges and questions inspired by his new songs. The second, more taboo themed single, "Creature", had attracted their attention seemingly. Trends were created where fans replicated the main choreography, and people were creating concept outfits to fit the song's theme.

Most of the shows had been filmed already, and just before the tour began, Taemin had one more show to film before he left in a week's time, Weekly Idol. He left the SHINee dorms early with Minho in tow, who apparently wanted to attend since his schedule was finally free from filming his drama and he had nothing to do. The others were all planning to go to the studio for the day, so Taemin made sure no-one was going to be left alone.

The car ride was mostly silent, Taemin and Minho both on their phones. They arrived on time and Taemin got ready for his filming, going through the script notes with Minho, who clearly had nothing better to do as he eagerly looked at the script. He pointed to a particular one, Complete Challenge, after a while and said,  
"Have they told you anything about the challenge?" Taemin shook his head, saying,  
"No, hyung. It's probably just a dance thing or one of those quizzes again." A woman entered and told them,  
"Hair and makeup is set up. We're ready for you."

Taemin stood up and turned to Minho,  
"Thanks for coming hyung." Minho shook his head and replied,  
"Oh no, I'm not gonna leave yet. I'll watch the filming in the observation room if I can get in." Taemin smiled and finally left to the stylists. Minho went to the observation room.

Once Taemin was ready for the shooting, they began. It started with a simple introduction and an aegyo game. Then they got down to business,  
"So Taemin, this new single… it's very complex isn't it?" Taemin nodded,  
"It's a mixture of themes. They all contradict one another, so the middle ground is right where this song sits."

"And the name, Creature, it's got a horror element to it, hasn't it?"

"Yes, it was quite shocking to the fans to see such a concept from me, since I don't usually do rock-inspired music. And-" he giggled, "they keep asking me why I made this song even if I don't like bugs." The host laughed with him, a glint in his eyes. After a few more questions he announced to the camera,  
"That's all for questions, now we can move on to the special game we prepared for you!"

*

They turned the cameras off for a moment while the staff brought in six boxes covered with black sheets. Taemin was confused but went along with it. It looked like one of those games where he had to guess the item inside the box. The host came up to him and explained,  
"So there's a six letter word you have to guess, and one letter is in each box. You have to guess the letters." Taemin asked,  
"Are there different things in the boxes? Like-"

Then one of the boxes chirped.

The idol flinched and stood back a little. He asked,  
"A-are there living things in there?!" The host laughed and reassured him,  
"Nothing harmful, don't worry! There are just some common creepy crawlies in the boxes, there's nothing to-"

"There's bugs in there?!" He almost screamed. The host laughed again. Taemin tried to regain his composure and say seriously,  
"Can we do something else instead of this task? I- I have a phobia of bugs, I can't-" The host's persona changed in an instant, his eyebrows furrowed,  
"I'm sure it's just a fear, Taemin. Men don't have phobias. Anyway, we've set it up now, so come over here to the first box."

Taemin felt his heart in his chest as he was led by the wrist up to the box. They turned the cameras back on as the host explained the rules of the game. It was simple in their eyes; just feel around the bottom of the box for a letter magnet and guess the word. Not so simple for Taemin. He frankly didn't give a fuck about the word guessing. Then the host stood close behind Taemin and lifted the sheet from the first box. In the box was a handful of cockroaches.

Taemin forgot all about professionalism and etiquette, as he flinched with a small shout and stepped backwards. Then he felt the host's hand on his shoulder, which he assumed was for support but really just scared him more. The host chuckled,  
"They aren't harmful! Just ignore them and find the letter." Taemin didn't want to look at the cockroaches, let alone put his hand anywhere near them.

Then the host started guiding his hand to the box. Taemin's heart skipped a beat,  
"No no no don't-!" But the host obviously didn't listen and pushed his hand towards the hole at the top of the box. It was covered by a sleeve of fabric so the cockroaches couldn't escape, but all Taemin could think of was them crawling up his own shirt sleeve.

He felt his breathing increase as he very slowly put his hand in. Immediately he felt something move against his hand and wrenched it back, letting out a scream. The host laughed; it sounded fond but Taemin knew it was mocking, and he cowered to the side for a moment. But his professionalism was taking over to respond to his panicked state. He edged closer to the box, and shut his eyes, shoving his hand in the box and feeling the bottom of it. He tried to find a letter of some sort but the cockroaches were touching his hand and he let out a shaky whimper.

Then he found a letter shape, and he tried to put his fingers around it to figure out what it was. He quickly made it out and pulled out his hand, stumbling to the side and breathing hard. His hand felt like it was on fire as he pictured the bugs crawling all over his hand and burrowing into the flesh. He whimpered and rubbed his hand against the fabric of his other sleeve.

*

Minho was feeling uneasy the moment they uncovered the first box. He knew how upset Taemin got with his phobia, and he knew for a fact that Taemin won't be able to handle this challenge. He turned to a staff member and asked,  
"Do they know about his phobia? Has Taemin given permission?" He already knew that Taemin didn't give permission to let them do this, since he said before that he hadn't even been told what the task was.

Then Minho watched as the host put their hands on Taemin and forced him forwards. His eyes widened as he leaned closer to the screen, watching him take hold of his wrist and pull his hand toward the box as Taemin squirmed and tried to move away from it. Minho found himself outraged at the way no-one was bothered by this. The staff all stood and just watched him struggle. Did they not take his phobia seriously? He could already picture the episode once it aired; the fake laughing tracks and stickers plastered over Taemin's suffering.

*

"Come on now Taemin! It isn't that bad!"

Three boxes had been completed, and Taemin was a shaking mess. His hand was trembling harshly and he could barely feel the letters. And then there was the bugs. In the second box there had been worms, and in the third was a large moth that had Taemin's skin crawling. They had just uncovered box four, which contained the crickets which had chirped earlier.

Adrenaline took over as tears fell down his cheeks. He pulled away from the host's grip and ran from the filming room. At the same time Minho ran from the observation room to find him. Taemin sprinted to the bathrooms and shut himself inside. Luckily it was a single stall bathroom so no-one would come in. If only he had locked the door properly.

He sobbed as he fell to the floor in a mess and scratched his hand violently. He didn't want to damage his skin but the feeling of them crawling on him, touching his skin and creating ghastly visions in his mind, was too much. Suddenly he imagined that the bugs had crawled into his sleeve and were in his clothes, eating them off and getting to his skin. He whined as he pulled at his shirt and squirmed around on the floor.

"Taemin!"

He screamed and started sobbing harder,  
"No! Stop, please please just stop, please-" The door opened and suddenly Minho was walking inside, closing the door behind him and crouching beside Taemin, who shrieked and scrambled away from him.  
"Taemin it's me, it's Minho-hyung. It's okay!" Taemin looked up, and was met with what looked like Minho, but he couldn't see past the black voids that replaced his usually soft brown eyes. His eyes looked like they had been caved in, reduced to nothing. Trails of dark blood coloured Minho's cheeks like the tear stains that soaked his own skin.

Taemin whimpered and edged away. He couldn't tear his eyes away from Minho. What had they done to him?  
"Taemin?" He could hear the smirk in his tone. Taemin saw movement within the gaping hole on the left of his face, and a colossal, blood covered centipede scuttled out of his eye, leaving another trail of blood and matter from the remains of his eyeball. Taemin couldn't stop himself from looking, even if adrenaline was forcing him to edge up against the wall, scratching his hand so hard the skin broke. The centipede crawled back and past his cheek, burrowing into his ear and making a terrible squelching sound.

*

"Taemin, it's just me! It's okay!"  
Taemin screamed over him, hands over his ears despite the bleeding,  
"NO NO NO STOP! PLEASE!" He began to scratch and rub all over his body, sobbing. Minho realised that Taemin was hallucinating and slowly got closer, holding his hand out, saying as tears began to fall down his own cheeks,  
"Close your eyes Taemin, it'll be over soon."

*

Close your eyes, Taemin.  
It'll be over soon.

More of the huge centipedes emerged from Minho's blackened hand and fell onto Taemin's legs, scrambling upwards and burrowing into his clothes. Wherever they touched felt burning hot and his skin prickled. Taemin shook his limbs violently and scratched and hit his own skin, all while screaming and sobbing.

He felt something rise in his throat as he quietened down, and frantically got to his knees, holding onto the toilet with his bleeding hands. He squeezed his eyes shut as he retched, liquid pouring from his mouth. When he opened his eyes, he was met with the sight of countless cockroaches crawling on top of each other in the toilet bowl. He started to hit himself on the head with the heels of his hands,  
"Stop!"

He squeezed his eyes shut again as he threw his head back and hit the wall.

It'll be over soon.

*

"Are you back with me, Taemin?"

Taemin squinted at the bright bathroom lighting on the ceiling. He turned to Minho and flinched, but there were no centipedes and blood and his eyes were still there. His beautiful brown eyes. What a relief he has those.

"Hyung?"

"Yeah it's me. You had quite a scare, you passed out after you hit your head."

Taemin sat up slowly, reaching up to feel the back of his head as it throbbed. As he retracted his hand he noticed it was dotted with semi dried blood,  
"I- I passed out? For how long?"

"Only a few minutes, don't worry. Are you… are you feeling okay now?"

He stared for a moment. Was he? Well, he wasn't hallucinating anymore.  
"Y-yeah, I think so." Minho breathed out a sigh of relief and leaned over to hug him. Taemin quickly moved away before he could touch him, and Minho pulled back,  
"I won't hurt you, Taemin. You know that, right?"

They embraced for a moment, and then Minho pulled back, not wanting to invade Taemin's personal space. But the maknae clung onto the elder, burying his face into his shoulder. He whispered,  
"They'll air the episode anyway, won't they?" Minho pressed a kiss to the side of Taemin's head and replied,

"Not on my watch."


	2. Minho [Dislocation]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk where i was going with the ending of this one but here you go

Minho was a competitive man. A little too competitive if you asked the members. He was constantly pushing himself to his limits to score just one more win. Of course it was bound to go wrong at least once. And of course it was gonna be in front of thousands of people, because that's just how Minho's luck worked.

The annual K-pop sporting event was one of Minho's favourite events as an idol. Screw that, it was his favourite event. None of the other members seemed to share his passion, especially Kibum who actually groaned out loud when they received the invite. Meanwhile Minho cheered and punched the air. The others were indifferent, but we're starting to dread what sort of dangerous task the second youngest might put himself through.

When it came to the day of the event, Minho was ready. He got up and showered at 6am, an ungodly time by most of SHINee's standards. They all piled into the car, and before they set off he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was Jinki.  
"Don't go overboard today, Min. You've gotta be safe." Minho nodded and turned back, still fully intent on going overboard. He wanted to do so well that he was gonna be in physical pain by the end of today.

(Which he was.)

(Not in the way he was expecting.)

He had signed up for as many competitions as possible, even volunteering to do some of Kibum's, which he was eternally grateful for. He ended up picking so many that the only thing Kibum had to do in the end was badminton. They arrived and signed in, going off in different directions to get their numbers stuck on them or safety lessons for the more abstract sports like the long jump over a pole, which Taemin was doing.

Then they were allowed to enter the main event arena, where they were greeted by the announcer over the speaker, and the screams of shawols and other fans. They were led over to a small area beside BIGBANG. Minho didn't even get time for greetings, as he had picked so many he was called up instantly for the first task: the relay.

Which he won. And the long jump. And the archery. And the javelin.

Then came the 100 metre dash. After all that Minho had just done, this was a walk in the park. The idols had five minutes to catch their breath (or in Minho's mind, train) before the event began. He walked over to his members with a huge goofy smile on his face. Kibum was lounging on the floor using Jinki's stomach as a pillow, and he had laid a towel over his legs like he was sunbathing or something, despite the fact that they were indoors.

"Hyungs! I'm gonna do the 100 metre!" Jinki looked up from his position as a pillow and said,  
"Really? I thought you were done! How many are you doing, Minho?" He was smiling so he wasn't serious, but Minho assured him,  
"It's fine hyung! This is my last one." Jinki put his head back down and muttered,  
"Just be careful, Min."

He tried. He really tried to be careful.

But luck has it that he didn't even get five seconds into the race before his ankle collided with another idol's as they went a little out of their lane. The other idol tumbled to the ground at high speed, probably scraping their hands and knees. But Minho got the brunt of the damage. He fell to his side and rolled once because of the speed he was running at. He felt a sickening pop in his left knee as the air was knocked out of his lungs. It took a couple of seconds, but then he got his senses back and screamed at the pain in his knee.

He wasn't looking, but he could almost picture Jinki throwing Kibum off his stomach and sprinting towards him when he heard his hyung shouting,  
"MINHO!" Minho groaned and rolled onto his right side, clutching his knee. If he relaxed a stabbing pain shot through his leg, if he moved it pretty much the same thing happened. In other words he was fucked. Jinki skidded to a halt on his knees as he practically threw himself at Minho, scrambling for an answer to what happened,  
"Are you okay? (concerned friend jpeg) What hurts? Do you need a hospital?"

Minho just groaned. He couldn't bring himself to speak. Minho saw in his peripheral that the other idol stood up, his knees scraped and bleeding. He crouched on Minho's other side and stumbled over their apology,  
"I'm so sorry! I didn't- I couldn't turn quick enough I- I'm sorry! Are- are you hurt?" Minho was confused at for a moment, when suddenly he remembered that the voice could only belong to one idol: Park Jimin.

A few medics shoved the other two out of the way and started asking a lot of questions that Minho didn't know how to answer. One asked,  
"Where does it hurt?" Great, a question he can actually answer. He panted as he ended up just saying,  
"My knee… I don't know I felt it move-" before he screamed again as one of the medics lightly pressed his knee. He could hear Jimin still trying to apologise in the background while a medic cleaned up his knees.

The medic holding his knee straightened his leg out, trying to assess the damage. Minho screamed and cried out the whole time, not even focusing on the shawols in the stands who must be distraught by the event. A thought briefly passed Minho's mind, why do they get to be sad? I'm the one in pain. The medic said after bending his leg the way it was again,  
"Definitely a dislocation of his left knee. And there's some broken skin but it's not serious."

Minho sighed, letting his head fall back onto the floor. Some more medics carried some sort of stretcher over to him and lifted him onto it, trying to carefully avoid touching his knee. He ended up being carried away to the private entrance to the arena, where there was an ambulance on site just in case something like this happened. He didn't go to hospital straight away, instead they made him sit on the side of the bed as they bent his leg slowly, asking how much it hurts. He pretty much responded with the same groan no matter how they moved it.

"We'll have to relocate your knee here before it swells up too much, okay? It will hurt a lot but it's only for a moment," one of the medics said. Minho let his head rest on the wall of the ambulance, groaning,  
"Yeah, just do it." The medic frowned,  
"It's gonna hurt a lot-"

"Just get it over with," Minho said, too embarrassed to admit defeat and show his hesitance. The second medic held onto his shoulder incase he moved a lot. Then without any other warning the first medic took ahold of his knee with one hand and his lower leg with the other. They first pressed down to feel the dislocation and Minho gasped, the feeling too painful for him to even scream right away. Then they straightened his leg with so much force Minho felt the same sickening crack he felt before, only worse.

He screamed and cried, trying to move away but the medics held onto him so he didn't damage himself more. Minho had never felt pain like this before. It took him a few minutes to calm down, and by the end of it he was a mess, trying to catch his breath. The medic asked,  
"Does it feel any better now? Can you move it at all without any pain?" Minho only groaned in response, leaning onto the second medic as his chest rose and fell at an frantic rate.

"Minho? Can you hear me?"

Minho whimpered when his vision blurred so suddenly, the pain reaching its peak. His eyelids began to feel heavy as he slumped further against the second medic. He could then feel someone squeeze his wrist for a moment, and then he could feel nothing at all. Finally, he was in the blissful haze he was waiting for. He didn't care about his image anymore. He didn't care about his pain tolerance. Now he just cared about watching the blackness slowly seep into his vision.

*

Once he lost consciousness the medics secured him and took him to hospital via the ambulance. Fans who couldn't attend the event had gathered at the road exits but thankfully moved out of the way for the ambulance, worried for Minho as Twitter had blown up since it had happened. A staff member who saw most of it all happen arrived to tell the idols (especially the rest of SHINee) what was happening. They were all huddled together in the idol's lounge, waiting for directions.

The medic told the SHINee members,  
"He had dislocated his knee, to put it simply. We had to relocate it on site to avoid any swelling but he lost consciousness due to the pain. He's on the way to a hospital now." The idols around the group listened in and started to spread the word to their members. Jinki stood up,  
"Can we go to hospital and see him?"

The medic nodded,  
"Unless you have to stay here and finish the event." Jinki shook his head; the group had been given permission to leave whilst the other idols had to continue. The other members all stood up and followed Jinki outside to the manager's car that they arrived in. The journey to the hospital was filled to the brim with awkward silence. They all just hoped Minho was okay.

*

Minho was awake by the time they had arrived, but he was still tired and sore. The only thing on his mind, however, is that his body had the audacity to faint right there in front of two strangers. When his members walked in, he said nothing. He only smiled lethargically at their worried shenanigans,  
"Guys, 'm okay. Just a dislocation."

"JUST a dislocation?! Minho, your bones, like, moved and stuff. They're not supposed to move!" Jonghyun started. Minho chuckled a little,  
"Well. I'm fine now. I've just gotta stay off it for a bit." Kibum argued,  
"Yeah, and we're in the middle of our tour, Choi. What are we gonna do about that?" Jinki cut in finally,  
"Guys, chill out. It's not like we haven't had to deal with this before."

He smiles at Minho,  
"It's gonna work out fine."


	3. Key [Appendicitis]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was originally split into 2 parts but i dont wanna do that here so here you go

When Kibum woke up in his room and felt a sharp stabbing pain in his abdomen, he knew the day was gonna be a bad one. They had a whole day of dance practice since they had to revise the 1of1 choreography. Jinki had hurt his ankle in dance practice a few days prior to the music video filming so tension was already high. And now Kibum, supposedly the 'second leader' had a terrible stomach ache. So things were… peachy.

He slowly eased himself out of bed and opened his wardrobe, opening the drawer full of his dance clothes. Without putting much thought into it, he pulled out a plain black t-shirt and light grey sweatpants that were fitted, yet loose and almost flared at the bottom. He stumbled over to the bathroom, and found the door shut and Minho waiting outside. Minho said groggily, eyes still shut and basically still asleep,  
"Taemin's in there. The hyungs are having breakfast."

Kibum sighed. He settled with going downstairs without showering. But there was a slight problem: the stairs. How the hell was he going to do dance practice for 10 hours? He couldn't even get down a flight of stairs without doubling over in pain. When his stomach calmed down enough for him to walk, he went into the dining room and found Jonghyun miserably poking some cereal. Jinki was attempting to make some breakfast whilst using crutches. Kibum ignored his stomach whilst he guided Jinki to the breakfast table and finished making his food.

He sat down at the table after serving Jinki his food. He only took some small sips of a cup of water and watched Jonghyun continue to miserably poke his now-soggy cereal. They made small talk about the music video filming whilst Kibum tried not to look like he was experiencing what felt like death.

*

He didn't eat anything before they left. A creeping sense of nausea was threatening him and he didn't want to throw up anything other than the water he forced down. The car journey was a nightmare too, so much that Taemin eventually noticed something. Despite being a bit of a brat when around Kibum he deeply cared for his hyung and was usually first to notice if he was feeling down.

"Hyung? I know it's not really my place to say but… uhh, you don't look very well. Are you sick?" Taemin asked, attracting the attention of the other members. Kibum didn't want to worry them, but at the same time he really wanted a little leniency when it came to practice. He fiddled with his hands whilst replying, feeling his cheeks burn as they all stared at him,  
"I don't know, it's just… I woke up with a really bad stomach ache and it hasn't gone away. I think it's getting worse."

It was silent and nothing happened for a moment, and then there were hands all over him. Jonghyun's hands were on his neck, massaging him lightly. Minho (despite having his moments with Kibum) was surprisingly kind and rubbed his arm. Taemin very affectionately patted his shoulder. Jinki didn't touch him and was more concerned, asking,  
"Can you still do practice? We can't film the MV with two members down."

Kibum shook his head, suddenly finding that he was on the verge of tears. He really didn't want to dance today. He held his stomach tightly, trying to savour the delicate touches the members were giving him, but the pain was too distracting. He couldn't hold back the small whimper that spilled from his lips. Jonghyun gasped as if it was him feeling the pain, and he rubbed Kibum's back in circles slowly, cooing,  
"Oh! My poor Kibummie, you must be having such a hard time!"

Kibum took a deep, shaky breath, trying to calm himself down before he burst into humiliating tears- or worse, threw up- in front of his members. The car seemed to be playing some twisted game of Devil's advocate as their driver went over a speed bump, jolting them all and impacting Kibum's stomach. A wounded sound escaped him as the air was knocked out of his lungs, his stomach tensing and leaping to his throat. He slapped a hand over his mouth as he felt his throat contract.

"Shit!" Minho shouted, turning to their driver and yelling, "Pull over!" The car jolted again as they stopped in the breakdown lane, which felt like a kick in the stomach to Kibum. He whined behind his hand and lurched forward with a dry heave. Taemin visibly panicked, not really being one for vomit but only for comfort. Jonghyun took care of the situation and unbuckled the younger's seatbelt. He reached over and flung the door open, watching Kibum stumble out and fall onto his hands and knees.

He got out of the car too and kneeled down next to him, momentarily glad that the car door was shielding them from the movement of the highway. Almost instantly Kibum spat out a mouthful of dark brown vomit, coughing and spluttering as it stained the gravel. His hands were aching as the gravel left prints on them. He gagged again and spat a stream of vomit onto the floor. Jonghyun rubbed Kibum's back awkwardly, mumbling,  
"It's okay, Bummie."

Kibum suddenly took a turn for the worst, face paling as he projectile vomited onto the pavement, and a little onto Jonghyun, who's knees happened to be in the… danger zone, so to speak. Jonghyun was barely fazed by it, only worried because of the fact that he didn't have a change of clothes. He mainly focused on the fact that Kibum was hyperventilating now, and he was sobbing quietly in fear. They all knew about Kibum's emetophobia, unlike all of the public. To Shawols he was a sassy, fearless man with no boundaries. To the members… yes he was still sassy, but not fearless.

"Kibummie, listen to me. It's okay, you'll feel better after, okay? I promise," Jonghyun reassured him. Kibum sobbed, which triggered his gag reflex and he violently brought up more vomit than he could handle. It was being forced out of him faster than his body could process, his stomach's way of trying to get rid of whatever was hurting it so much. Unfortunately, just vomiting it up couldn't cure an appendix that was threatening to burst at any wrong movement.

Obviously none of them knew that.

Kibum reached up to wipe his mouth with his sleeve, thinking there couldn't possibly be anything left in him after he'd just projectile vomited… twice. Fortunately, his nausea subsided as he panted through it. Unfortunately, the stomach pains did not. He fell to his side and curled up, not really caring that the gravel dug into his arm. He squirmed around on the floor, unable to hold back his whines. He had never felt pain like this in his life.

Jonghyun was startled at how Kibum was acting, looking at Jinki for some sort of guidance. Jinki yelled over the cars,  
"Is he responding?" Jonghyun leaned down and placed a hand on Kibum's cheek, saying clearly and slowly as if speaking to a child,  
"Bummie, can you hear me?" Kibum sobbed loudly but he eventually nodded. Jonghyun did a thumbs up at Jinki and shouted,  
"How do I get him in the car, hyung?"

Jinki leapt out of the car and carefully scooped Kibum up in his arms, one arm hooked under his knees and the other supporting his back as Kibum curled into his chest and held fistfuls of his hyung's shirt, not letting go any time soon. Jonghyun brushed off pieces of gravel from himself and Kibum's shirt before they all got back into the car. Minho had moved to the passenger seat and made room for Kibum to lay down, and Taemin was now sat in the back seat. Jonghyun sat in the back seat too, allowing Jinki to sit with Kibum curled up like a cat in his lap.

Kibum kept crying quietly to himself, barely noticing the change in setting. Jinki placed his hand carefully over Kibum's stomach, asking for permission to touch him. Kibum gasped and pushed Jinki's hand away, moaning,  
"Nooo… s-stop!" Jinki understood and withdrew his hand, instead just stroking Kibum's hair, which had the boy melting into the touch. He asked sadly as the car pulled back into the highway,  
"I wonder what's made you this sick, Bummie. You seemed fine yesterday."

When they arrived at the SM building, the others got out and went to get ready for practice. Jinki stayed with Kibum and guided him out of the car. Throughout the car ride he started to feel better, when suddenly the pain had disappeared completely. He had ended up sleeping the rest of the car ride.

He got out of the car and was stopped by Jinki who said,  
"I don't want you to practice, okay? I'm still worried and it scared me to see you like that. You can watch but please don't dance today." Kibum nodded, convinced that he was fine and that he'd just felt bad because of some food that was off or something. He went over to the practice room with the others, exhausted but not feeling pain. He sat with the members' things and watched, eventually finding that he was too tired to stay awake. It took him almost no time to fall asleep.

Little did he know, his appendix had ruptured in the car before, and that's why he felt so numb and lethargic. Now an infection was slowly plaguing him from his appendix to his stomach. And there was nothing he could do to stop it.

*

The second time Kibum woke up that day was even worse than the first. His stomach had done that thing again where it tries to escape him via his mouth. He stirred with a small groan, and found himself still lay among the members' bags and jackets, which he had accidentally ended up using as pillows. However they didn't provide any comfort for his stomach ache, which had returned with revenge to take.

The others had been practising, Jinki standing at the front and regretting carrying Kibum earlier, as it had awoken a new pain in his ankle. He only supervised the other three, who tried to imagine Kibum was there while they struggled through formation changes. They were all lay on the floor and taking a breather for a few minutes when they heard Kibum's soft whine from the corner of the room.

They all looked over at once and for a second it was hard for Minho to tell which part of the luggage pile contained Kibum. Then he saw him lay with his head on Taemin's bag, eyes squeezed shut as he panted through another stomach cramp. Minho shot up, despite his own exhaustion, shouting,  
"Hyung!"

He skidded onto his knees beside Kibum and asked in a panic,  
"What's wrong? Is it hurting again?" Kibum sobbed a little and nodded. He curled up in a similar way to before, but this time it felt different. It felt… dangerous. Before it was just a stomach ache, but now it felt like someone had actually put a lit match into his digestive system. He inhaled in short, sharp breaths, as deep breaths upset his stomach more.

Kibum felt wrong in so many ways. His mind was all floaty, but not in a good, dreamy way. He felt like he was losing himself, experiencing it all from someone else's eyes. He felt someone's hand on his forehead and then some muffled shouting, and he was busy trying to figure out who's face was in front of his own.

Minho put his hand on Kibum's forehead and gasped when he felt the immense heat radiating off him. He called to the others,  
"He's burning up!" He faced Kibum again and asked,  
"Key-hyung, do you know where you are?" He got no reply, instead Kibum just subconsciously started to stroke his own stomach on the left side and made a small distressed sound. Minho lifted Kibum's shirt a little, slowly guiding the elder's hand away. He saw how red and irritated his stomach looked and, thinking he suddenly understood that Kibum was asking for comfort, he rubbed over the right side of his abdomen.

Kibum screamed bloody murder, throwing his head back and starting to cry hysterically, delirium really hitting him hard. Minho drew his hand away in surprise, looking at the others helplessly. Jinki limped over and took Kibum into his arms again, swiftly leaving the room. He carried him down to their first aider's office. Kibum whined weakly. Jinki limped but he kept going faster as he said,  
"I'm gonna get you some help, Kibummie. Then you can feel better, yeah?"

Kibum retched violently all of a sudden, bringing up a mouthful of pink stomach acid and saliva that splattered onto his shirt, somehow missing Jinki. They arrived at the office and Jinki knocked on the door by just hitting it with his knee a couple times. The door opened and revealed Dr Kwan, the doctor who did their monthly check ups and went on tour with them just in case. When he saw the shaky, whimpering Kibum in Jinki's arms he didn't waste time with greetings, stepping back to allow them access to the examination room.

He asked quietly to Jinki who was carefully laying Kibum on the reclined medical chair,  
"Can you describe his condition? I heard about what happened in the car but I need details to diagnose him." Jinki replied as he rubbed Kibum's arm gently,  
"So far it's a stomach ache and nausea. He's felt a little feverish but not too much. The only reason I was worried enough to take him to you is because it happened so suddenly." Kibum writhed around in the chair as his stomach burned, whining something unintelligible.

Jinki shushed him gently and played with his hair. Dr Kwan stood closer to Kibum and said as he rubbed some sanitizer on his hands (sanitize y'all!),  
"Okay, Kibum. I'll have to have a quick check of your stomach to confirm that it is your appendix." The doctor lifted Kibum's messy shirt and began to press gently on different areas. Because Kibum's appendix had ruptured and been left untreated, he now had peritonitis, and it had spread an infection all across his stomach.

Kibum started hyperventilating as the pain built up. His stomach was hard and inflamed, and even a little bloated because the infection had taken up space. Dr Kwan concluded by saying,  
"His appendix has ruptured. From his symptoms I think it's infected." Jinki was left clueless as Dr Kwan left to call an ambulance. Kibum whimpered quietly. The pain was so bad that all he could do was breathe through it. He wasn't even screaming. He couldn't bring himself to.

Jinki felt himself tearing up as he watched Kibum physically giving up, going silent and no longer writhing around in pain. He wished there was something he could do to ease his pain.

*

When the ambulance arrived, Jinki went with him. When the adrenaline wore off his ankle had started to ache badly, so it was just as well really. It was probably caused by carrying Kibum so much, but he didn't regret it one bit. Whilst Kibum was in surgery he got his ankle checked and wrapped tightly to keep it in one position. 

The other members arrived shortly after and got updated. Apparently when Kibum vomited earlier, the movement caused his appendix to rupture, which is why he suddenly felt numb and passed it off as feeling better. Then he got infected, which is why it came back and caused the high fever and delirium. When he was out of surgery and awake, they were allowed to visit him.

He wasn't as scary looking as they expected, there was only a feeding tube in his nose and an IV in his wrist. Jinki was allowed the chair beside him because he had to rest his ankle. The others stood around him as he laid unconscious. After a few minutes of silence Kibum groaned softly, turning his head to one side and bringing a hand to itch his stomach instinctively, but Jinki grabbed his hand and put it back on the bed, intertwining his fingers with his own.

Kibum made a noise of confusion and asked groggily,  
"Mgh… what's the time?" Jinki smiled fondly at his cluelessness and replied,  
"It's midnight now, Bummie. You slept for a while." Kibum opened his eyes and looked around at the other members, eyebrows furrowed in confusion,  
"Am I… why- why am I in a hospital?" Taemin knelt down, shyly running Kibum's shoulder,  
"You had surgery, hyung. It was your appendix."

"... What?"

Jinki took over, using his free hand to brush away strands of Kibum's hair,  
"You don't remember? You had a poorly tummy, Kibum. It got really bad." Kibum shook his head, mumbling,  
"Dunno, it's- it's not familiar. Is that normal? Do people… forget stuff happened?" Jinki nodded and said,  
"Yeah, Bummie. It's normal to forget things that happened when you're delirious. You were really sick and your fever was pretty high. You threw up a few times on the highway."

Kibum closed his eyes again and said slowly,  
"Glad I don't remember that part." Minho chuckled and said,  
"Yeah, I wish I could forget that part. It was horrible to watch." Kibum blushed bright pink. He didn't really want to hear about all the things he did in front of his members.

Over the next few days, Kibum stayed in his private room as various friends and idols visited him. SM released a statement to say that he won't be participating in any of the 1of1 promotions and neither will Jinki. When he was discharged from hospital he stayed in the dorms with his eldest hyung as they both struggled through the recovery.

But at least they were struggling together.


	4. Jonghyun [Cut]

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ending to this one is really choppy, and its from kibums pov, sorry if you dont like that i know some people hate 1st person

When the door finally clicks open in the dead silence of the foyer, I breathe a sigh of both relief and concern. He said he would be home by 9:00pm. Nine. O'clock.

It's almost 1:00am.

I adjust myself on the awkwardly shaped kitchen stool that I promised I would replace but never got around to doing, hoping I look intimidating enough to get an explanation out of him before he disappears again. I hear shuffling and picture him kicking his shoes off in a rushed, panicked manner. He thinks I'm asleep. He thinks I'm asleep, and that he's gonna get away with going radio silent for hours.

I see a black shape in the doorway. He has no idea I stayed up all night for him, weighing up calling the police as he didn't answer my call for the 5th time. He steps into the light, but I still can't see his face due to his hood. He approaches the bottom of the flight of stairs.

"Back by 9 o'clock? Really?"

Jonghyun turns around at the speed of light, clearly terrified. Good. He's been giving me the scare of my life all night. I stand up and wave my phone in the air, shaking it with every word,  
"I called you so many times! You couldn't even think to reply with a single text? I almost called the police, Kim Jonghyun! And you said you'd be back by nine o'clock. What time do you call this?"

I step closer to him as I speak. He doesn't reply at all. He doesn't even seem to be blinking. I shove his shoulder a little, starting to get more concerned than angry,  
"What were you doing? Oh my god, have you been drinking?" Then I hear him speak in barely a whisper as he turns away,  
"Stop worrying. I'm fine." My voice shakes, which pisses me off because I'm trying to get some information out of him, not start crying,  
"I have every right to worry. Where were you?"

He turns and starts to walk away. Anger boils in my blood,  
"Don't you fucking dare! Don't you walk away from me Kim-"  
I try to grab him and turn him to face me again, but he falls against the wall with a choked groan, clutching his waist where I grabbed him. I watch him fall but don't make a move to approach him. I ask,  
"What was that? What have you done to yourself now?" He starts to pant as he presses his hands to his abdomen.

I kneel down hastily and pull away his hands. The lights are off. But I can see the dark patch. His shirt is white and I can see. The fucking. Dark patch.

"Jonghyun. What happened?"

"I got... I got in the way."

I lift his shirt and he cries out as the fabric sticks to open flesh. I actually almost gag when I see the gash across his side, shallow at his hips and then deepening as it stretches across the right side of his stomach. It's thin and thankfully not deep by the looks of it. But it's long and consistent, and there's a lot of blood. Clearly done with a standard blade, not a serrated dagger or anything. Still.

"How the fuck did you hide this? How could you hide this? Did you think you were gonna make it upstairs and pretend it didn't happen?" I ramble as I grab him by the arms and pull him up, letting him rest on me before I lie him on the just cleaned kitchen floor. If he's gonna get blood everywhere I want it on the tiles, not the carpet. I stuff the hem of his shirt into his own hand, and he gets the idea and keeps it lifted off the wound. I get up quickly and run to the bathroom, taking out the first aid kit from under the sink.

Upon my return, Jonghyun is now spluttering and choking out breaths. He's panicking. That's not good. He's already lost quite a bit of blood, about a quarter of a litre, and that's just since I've seen him. I fall to my knees again and open the first aid kit, taking out a piece of clean cloth and scrunching it up. I have to somehow put pressure on the whole wound, but it's too long. So I get Jonghyun to grab one end with his free hand and press it to his stomach while I press his side. He chokes on a groan and starts to cough. I have no idea why I'm so calm. Yeah, it's in my job description to stay calm when treating someone, but this is my boyfriend for God's sake.

"Kibum..."

"Deep breaths, Jjong. You're gonna be okay."

"I feel... I'm- ungh-"

I look at him. He's about two seconds from losing consciousness right then and there. He's losing grip on the cloth and blood is seeping through and soaking his fingers. I sob quietly and shout at him,  
"Don't fucking faint on me! That's not fair, Kim fucking Jonghyun, take some deep breaths for fuck's sake!"

The good thing about this whole situation is that at least I'm allowed to swear at this patient. He still faints anyway. Obviously. Shouting at him only postponed it, kept him alert for a couple seconds longer. I try and put pressure on the wound with my entire forearm so I can take my phone back out and dial whoever I see first that lives vaguely close to us. Jinki. No, he'll freak out. Taemin and Kai. A good option but they'll both insist on coming and that's too many people to handle. Minho lives the closest and I'm about two seconds from bursting into tears so I click dial without another thought.

"Minho I swear to the fucking gods above if you don't pick up-"

"Hyung it's 1am, what the fuck-"

I drop my phone on the floor and focus both my hands on pressing the cloth down again,  
"Minho please come take us to hospital, Jjong got cut in the street and he's bleeding fucking everywhere and I can't take care of it myself." There was silence on the line for a few seconds. I almost burst out crying thinking he had hung up, too tired and dysfunctional to help a brother out at 1am on a Friday morning but then,  
"Shit, umm... give me five minutes and I'll be at your door. Do you wanna stay on the line with me? Can I talk to him?"

I whimper quietly.  
"He's unconscious, Minho! Fuck, I can't do this."

"Hey hey hey calm down! Take some deep breaths, Bummie. This is your thing. You're good at this."

"I'm good at this when it's whiney teenage boys who come to me for paper cuts, Minho. My boyfriend's been cut, and for some reason I'm not so good anymore!"

There is silence for a moment.

"Hyung-"

"Minho I swear to God-" I sigh. Wiping my tears on my shoulder I continue, "look, I owe you big time after this, just please... stop trying to reassure me and get your ass over here before he loses more blood than he needs to." I place my head down to Jonghyun's chest and sigh when I feel he's breathing relatively normal, despite it being a little too quick. I hear a door slam on the line and assume Minho is getting into his car. He says,  
"I'm about to leave now hyung. I'll stay on the line. I know you probably hate me right now but just talk to me. Please. I don't want you to panic too much."

I inhale shakily,  
"He's... He's gonna be okay, I think. I'm putting pressure on it but it's way too long and I can't cover it all on my own."

"Has he been cut anywhere important? Is it deep?"

"No it's- it's just bleeding a lot. That's my main concern right now- …wait."

I look at Jonghyun's face. His eyes move under his eyelids. He's waking up. I press on the wound in another place, making up for the lack of attention it's been getting since Jonghyun lost his grip on the cloth.

"What? Wait for what?"

"Jonghyun? Jonghyun sweetie, can you hear me?"

He opens his eyes. I smile weakly at him,  
"There we go. Keep your eyes open a little longer, sweetheart. Can you do that? Can you stay awake for me?" His breath hitches as I press harder and he tries to move away with a heart-breaking whine. I whisper,  
"It's okay, it's okay Jjong, just stay awake for me, okay?"

Minho pipes up,  
"I'm almost there. Hang in there Bummie." I nod, and then I remember that he can't see me,  
"M'kay. You can hang up now. I'll see you in a minute." The call ends and I turn my attention completely to Jonghyun, who's started writhing around on the floor, his black hair a mess the more he struggles. I fight for control without hurting him but he's starting to act out to avoid the pain.

"I know. I know it hurts, sweetie, I'm sorry." He whines again, and starts mumbling incoherently, but I manage to make out,  
"Hurts… tummy hurts- ah!" Tears start streaming down my cheeks again,  
"I know. It's okay, Jonghyun. Just… just stay awake for me." I hear another key in the door. The second of the night. This time it's Minho, who rushes inside and quite quickly spots me on the floor. Luckily the bottom floor of our apartment is open-plan so he finds us pretty quickly.

"Minho, Jesus Christ. Thank you-"

"Nope, save the thank you's for later, get him in the car now!"

Minho picks him up by hooking his arms under Jonghyun's, and I keep pressing onto the wound. We struggle but we manage to get him in Minho's car. I sit in the back with Jonghyun curled up into my side. Minho locks the door and runs to the driver's door. Then I realise-  
"Oh my god, the blood. Minho, I'll clean it, I'll replace the seats or whatever-" Minho turns on the engine and pulls out of our drive, shouting over the initial roar of the engine,  
"He's more important than my seats, hyung."

Suddenly something else hits me-  
"Shit! There's traffic, Min, the storm yesterday, it-"  
"-it delayed all the flights. Fuck, we'll have to take a shortcut through the residences." Minho realises. Jonghyun starts to shift in my lap, and I shush him gently. I look down at his wound again, very quickly moving the cloth away to get a look at it. It's not as much of a mess as before, but it's still bleeding from the places I can't reach. Jonghyun lets out these small whimpers every time I press harder that break my heart into pieces.

He's turning paler every few minutes. The amount of blood he's lost isn't too serious, but it's enough to fuck with his body. We approach the highway. Minho looks back at me in the mirror,  
"It's gonna be hard to get to the exit, hyung. We might get stuck in the traffic if I don't speed up." I really want him to drive safely but if we get to the hospital sooner then Jonghyun can get treated properly. I nod,  
"Please, can you try?"

Minho nods. We speed up and unfortunately go over a speed bump, sacrificing comfort to get there faster. However it has a downward spiral effect on Jonghyun, who clutches onto my shirt and whines loudly, voice sounding more panicked than before. I quickly press onto the wound again because the sudden movement caused me to lose grip on the cloth.  
"Hey hey, it's okay sweetie, you're gonna get help soon," I try to comfort, but he just whines again and says,  
"Hurts… mgh, dizzy-"

Shit. I don't want him to faint again. I need him to be responsive. Minho swears loudly as he misses the exit and gets forced to join the traffic. And suddenly the car is at a standstill. At least I have time to figure out what the fuck to do. Minho turns back, and I explain,  
"The speed bump fucked him up, Min. We've gotta hurry."

Finally the traffic moves. Slowly. But it's better than nothing. What would usually be ten minutes turns into half an hour, and we finally arrive at hospital. Jonghyun is sedated, disinfected, stitched up, the whole lot. Me and Minho sit and wait for him in the family room. When we can see him we finally get an explanation. He was caught in the middle of a street fight, some drunk fool pulled out a knife and it got messy.


End file.
